So, in an attempt to try something new, I would like to ask both casual and regular readers to watch the video clip attached below with comedian and TV host Steve Harvey answering a question posed by seven-time Grammy winning, multi-platinum selling, R&B vocal goddess Toni Braxton…
He can’t breathe without you?
As an asthmatic I can tell you with authority, it’s bad enough experiencing that sensation without the aid of an inhaler, so I’m not too sure I want undergo that feeling just because I’m not in the vicinity of my fiancé.
At this point it’s fair to say to yourself “But Tyrone, you know he wasn’t being literal right!?” Yeah, I know… but I’m not too sure if he was giving counsel that was totally genuine or Disney infused advice that sounded good for television? Do you know what I mean?
You have to remember this is the same Steve Harvey that wrote the New York Times best seller Act Like A Lady, Think Like A Man, therefore without question, Mr Harvey has more profound relationship wisdom to offer the world than I, however I do think that within a relationship (no matter how early the stage) the emphasis shouldn’t necessarily depend on your sense of orientation when you are apart from one another, but rather what happens when you share the same physical space.
In a digital age it’s pretty easy to “check in” on each other and state just how much you love or miss your significant other and I don’t knock it because I do it to…but what is the point of all the affectionate texts, WhatsApp messages, phone calls or dedicated “couple selfie” Instagram and/or Facebook posts, if it isn’t reflective of real life interactions?
So at this point you may scowl at the screen you are reading from and ask yourself “Are you suggesting there is something wrong with me, if I miss my lover?”
Because I do think Steve Harvey was onto something; there really is nothing like good company, which is not to be confused with a babbling stream of conversation. I simply mean a situation where you can freely ebb and flow between interactive dialogue and deeply comfortable silence.
Really good company is akin to watching your favourite television series and realising you only have two episodes left until the end of the season. What do you do? Do you panic and start to hyperventilate? Or do you feel a little empty inside but live in the comfort of knowing you can invest in those characters again when the new season returns.
I have made no secret that I have been through a variety of romantic, casual and committed situations and somehow managed to survive, with my soul intact. I think great company could arguably be the number one quality that an individual should look for on the quest to find that special someone, however even if it doesn’t take the number one spot, just like the song Thunder by Imagine Dragons, it should at least crack the top 10.
I have had many people who believe my theory to be an outdated concept in this swirling tornado of a digital existence we live in, but even if you met your significant other through the use of technology (as referenced in You Mean, I Didn’t Have To Actually Go On A Date!!?) much like Eleven, Dustin, Mike, Lucas and Will, you’ll eventually have to move from the upside down and figure out how to deal with our actual reality.
So, I wouldn’t worry too much about the person who makes you feel light headed or breathless as soon as they leave a room, I wouldn’t even be too concerned if the person of your affection doesn’t feel the need to text you every five minutes. If you get to the stage where you and your mate can sit in a room alone and enjoy the pleasure of each other’s company within the same shared space, that is a good indication you should be able to cope pretty well apart from one another.
I love my fiancé dearly and I do miss her company more often than I care to admit, but if you ever see me walking by myself, struggling to breathe, sweating with a high fever, it’s not because I’m not with my fiancé, it’s because I need a paramedic or a doctor.
Until next time.